psychotic dreamer

my dream: this dream does not reflect any sort of reality.

i just had a weirdo dream about and (two of my lj friends) and the 9/11 attacks. i dreamt that anhedonia had come back from her trip and had posted this huge lj post about her trip including about 20 or so pictures. however, everything in her post was jumbled and i couldn't read or see anything clearly. for some reason, this disturbed me and i made this crazy decision to drive up to california to visit them. the next thing i know, i'm getting out of a cab at their house and there's no one home. i break in somehow because i'm in a bedroom looking at some print outs of her post. i start to read it when i realize that she'd be pissed if she knew i was reading her personal stuff. then i realized that i was crazy because i had broken into their house. i quickly ran out of the house and tried to sneak away. at this point, my heart was racing with the realization of where i was and how preposterous it all was. just as i was escaping, a car pulls up and it's anhedonia! i panic completely trying to disguise myself and continue walking. however, another car pulls up behind her and it's octopus and they both have a look of recognition on their face. i know i'm screwed. they both get out of their car, rather flustered, and ask me what i'm doing there. i told them that i just wanted to visit them. for some reason, they understood and invited me to come into their house. the next thing i know, anhedonia and i are talking. she's next to a building pulling at some flowers. she tells me how much she longs to have many children but octopus doesn't want any more because he has two from a previous marriage. she has red hair now and it's long. she starts to cry and i ask her why and she says something about the coldness of the world.

the next thing i know, i'm at best buy looking through the cd rack for the As Good as it Gets soundtrack. at first, i can't find it..but then i see the words but the picture on the cover doesn't match the movie. i quickly call jeremy on my cellphone and ask him what is going on. he doesn't know. the tvs in the store are replaying the 9/11 attack only all i see is fire. i'm terrified by this for some reason.

the next thing i know, i'm standing in downtown manhattan. i'm trying to get into a cab. things are falling all around me and i see darkness and fire. everything is a blur from then on. fancy people are around me now. we're trying to do a group project but everyone thinks i'm too stupid to contribute. they're all wearing fancy dresses. i feel small and depressed. i go walking to some coffee shop and order a non-coffee coffee..

that's all i can remember.