hey j,
are you out there? i'm so tired. i am so very tired. i'm tired because the days won't let me go and the nights won't let me rest. i feel like every breath is part of a rule i am abiding to. it's all so dreary and yet i so want to be deleriously amused with my life. but that's just not to be. not yet anyhow. i feel like an empty vessel. i could so easily slip away from myself. i could so easily just give in and dissapear into the mundane.
i'm so tired of the ignorance. so bored with the tediousness of listening to these helpless beings. why are they so weak? it's so easy to simply march, to get your shit together and move forward. but they can't. and they annoy me. and that probably makes me a bad person. but i'll mask my anger and hatred with an abundant amount of sweet gestures and good intentions.
i am so bad. i am good. i am tired of being both. i like the idea of writing to you because i know you can't hear me. i know you. you can't see beyond simplicity. and that's a good thing. because i'd hate for us both to be trapped in my hell.
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