bread and sex

this afternoon, i flipped on the food network and caught this show, sarah's secrets, on how to make cheap hors d'oeuvres using store bought bread. it was awesome. i might try it out. here's how
i then stuck in replacement killers and only got through the first few minutes before i tanked for a few hours. i was out till late which is bad because i need to get back on a normal sleeping schedule. ah well.

i was thinking about my sexual orientation tonight. i also took a look at the Kinsey Scale and noted that i'm about a 2-3. the thing is that i'm sexually attracted to women by body only. however, i prefer the male penis to the female vagina. does this mean i'm supposed to be attracted to transexuals? hahaha.

don't need a reason

i had a friend ask me for an authorization code to join livejournal. i had no idea they had this policy in place. it suprises me. they do give a generous amount of authorization codes but who am i to decide who is fit for lj or not? that's crazy.

last night, i couldn't go to sleep so i got up and did some sketching. it was sort of maddening to scribble down the images that came to mind. i'm not very good at it. i think it takes some practice. tigger was unimpressed. :)

i've been craving pancakes for some reason. i think that ever since i saw that ihop commercial where they had the blue berries on one side and the strawberries on the other, i've been hooked. maybe one of these weekends i will indulge myself to a unhealthy portion of yummy hot pancakes.

one too many tvs

tonight was fine. jerms and i had a conversation about his lack of "online-ness"..which i defined as expressing oneself online. at one point, i got him to start a live journal but then he stopped. i forget why. he's a gamer. i'm an onliner. i guess, in the end, it fits.

i had a convo with a friend today about changing my way of dealing with issues that worry me. i'm going to start making a conscious effort to stop worrying from now on.
it's getting to the point where i'm feeling the physical harm of being a paranoid freak.
i think this will be a healthy and wise investment. let's see if it works out.

i also have come to the realization that i love cheez-it crackers. they're cheesy crisp goodness. i'm going to try and become their spokesperson. hehe. just kidding.

i helped a friend haul his new tv to his apartment. i had to drive out to Fry's Electronics and they loaded the 32" into my CRV. yeah, it was good for something. he might be returning it soon if the picture quality isn't good. pretty soon, our condo will have one too many tvs in it. jerms is bringing down his fifty two inch tv down so our thirty inch will have to be scooted over. i think we'll just keep two tvs in the living room so john can play his PS2 games on the smaller tv. i don't think it's good to play ps2 games on a projection tv. i don't know.

yeah for old and random!

what do you think of this comment i found

"most livejournal people are boring morons. hrm. i hope i'm not that way when i get old and random."

another one bites the dust

i've always had such a strong sense of self. i live in my own mind, almost completely introverted during the day and twilight hours. i guess this is why i find it hard discovering that some people have far fewer layers than others. we're not all of the same internal anguish and hidden desires. some people are really what you see. i guess that's a scary thing for me.

Blackbird (Lennon/McCartney)

Blackbird singing in the dead of night
Take these broken wings and learn to fly
All your life
You were only waiting for this moment to arise.

Blackbird singing in the dead of night
Take these sunken eyes and learn to see
All your life
You were only waiting for this moment to be free.

Blackbird fly Blackbird fly
Into the light of the dark black night.

Blackbird fly Blackbird fly
Into the light of the dark black night.

Blackbird singing in the dead of night
Take these broken wings and learn to fly
All your life
You were only waiting for this moment to arise
You were only waiting for this moment to arise
You were only waiting for this moment to arise.

nightmares and dreams

it's the weirdest thing that my normal dreams are other people's nightmares. granted, my dreams always have a "nightmare part" to them, but they are incorporated into my life. it's like i have to take the horrish with the supernatural. last night i dreamt i was running for my life, almost gang raped by a bunch of hillbillies, crawling in a pit of snakes, bitten by a yellow snake and had to pull it's fangs out of my leg, stuck in the osborne's house begging everyone to play shadowrun with me (they wanted to play some superhero game), i even dreamt that jerms showed up to the house wearing a superman constume. my dreams are always bizarre like this. i used to wake up every day during college and say to jerms "i had the weirdest dream last night".. but now they are not so weird..they're my regular dreams.

i couldn't sleep when i went to bed so i put in deep impact and watched half of it till i got drowsy. tigger was stretched out next to me making a tired look on his face. he's so lucky. i really do envy my cats. i kissed him. i always thought the affection towards animals was a weird one..but i just want my cats to know they're loved. does this make me a freak? heh. too bad they can't understand me.

it's 3am and i know i'm lonely

it's super late again. i just got done downloading songs.
i love techno. i'm a freak. must dance. i guess i just need to get it out of my system. i imagine this is what it's like to be a pent up sixteen year old boy. hah.

my throat is so dry but i'm too lazy to go get some water to drink. dying here.
did a lot of site stuff today. again, refused to study for my exam. "L" : das for my forehead.

have you given your sweetie a kiss lately? the kissing booth