problem child

i was able to resolve things last week concerning my "issue".
i feel weird.
this live journal is supposed to be my outlet but i don't feel comfortable posting anymore. not about
things concerning work and life because of my fear that some people will read it.

i know i could post friends only but that seems futile. considering most of the people on my friend's list are AYBYAM.
(added you because you added me) which means i'm WAY more interested in their journals than they are or should be in mine.
and that's fine. that's how i like it.

my journal is meant to be public. it's my way of sharing, venting...throwing a question out into the void.


i can't believe how furious i was those past two weeks. i can't believe how frustrated some people can make me.
i can't believe how frustrated i let people get me. it's too much. it's ridiculous. it's ludicrous when you think of things on the macro level. what the hell do i have to complain about? i know. our daily stupid toils. our daily stupid problems. boo hoo. sometimes i make myself so mad. shape up! get over it. get over your poor miserable life. you're a weak little girl who doesn't know how to appreciate a good thing when she's got it. sometimes i say to myself "someone should take it all away from you. so you'd see how stupid you're being. you should be slapped into some sense of the world around you. you and your problems are so idiotic."

but then again. i'm selfish. and my problems are my problems and i feel them so intensely because i know no other problems. life goes on. i scream. i fuss. i cuss. and the world keeps going.

what's the point?